On Leading Well

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Creating Success by Supporting Each Other…

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Creating Success by Supporting Each Other…

Andrea J. Miller
Apr 6, 2022
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Creating Success by Supporting Each Other…

andreamiller.substack.com

In this issue: Creating Success by Supporting Each Other…/How to take your remote team building beyond Zoom happy hours / Where We Go Wrong with Collaboration / The Lighter Side

Creating Success by Supporting Each Other…

What have you been putting off?

You know, those things you may not be doing because, well, they’re just too uncomfortable, too hard, or, perhaps you just keep telling yourself you’ll do them later (a personal favorite :).

I’d say I have a list of things, but I’ve put off creating that too.

But last week was different.

Last week, I crossed two important items off my imaginary list.

I recorded and posted my first LinkedIn video…

And I wrote and shared a different kind of story, one that was more personal than I’m normally comfortable posting.

For many, possibly most of you, neither of those things will seem terribly big or important… but it wasn’t about the outcome, it was about taking that often overwhelming first step.

The thing is, I’d probably still be procrastinating on both those things, except for the support of my colleagues/friends.

In a world that can sometimes (particularly lately) feel chaotic, and at times overwhelming, there’s immeasurable value in having people in your life who are not only willing to push you out of the airplane but who will also be there to ensure you pull the chord on your chute :).

The impact was/is immeasurable.

There will be more videos.

And there will be more personal and hopefully (for your sake) relevant stories.

The Most Difficult and Important Ask

So, what about you?

Who are those people who will hold your hand when the fear overwhelms you as you get close to the edge …and then kindly push you out of the plane (hmm, probably not the best metaphor)?

In this DIY world, it’s easy to confuse independence with success.

Though it may seem satisfying to accomplish everything on your own, it’s usually far more rewarding (and fun), when you’re supported and in turn, are able to support others.

One of my favorite things to say, and remind myself and others of, is to “just ask” for the help you need.

In truth, this was one of the most difficult and important lessons I was forced to learn after my surgeries.

I had been stubbornly independent.

Until I couldn’t be.

I’ll save you the psych eval and only say that it was a lesson that’s vastly improved my life and on occasion the lives of others.

Research shows that across cultures, human beings are hardwired for giving and helping others.

It literally makes us feel good.

And it’s also good for our health.

So, if you’re hesitating about asking others for help, don’t, you’d actually be doing them a favor :).

And it could just turn out to be the push you need to soar.

Finding/Creating Your Tribe

Finding the people you need to support you can be far easier than you think. It can be as simple as asking yourself a few questions and then, taking that scary first step.

1.    Where do you need help?  It’s important to be clear about what you need and depending on what that is, identify who can provide the help you need. Be realistic and don’t over ask. For instance, if your friend is a marketer and you need marketing help, don’t expect them to do your work for free. If you’re unsure about the “line,” e.g. what’s okay, again, just ask.

2.    Who can you help? The benefits are clear, helping others can help you too. Getting into a positive state may be all you need to change your thinking and move into action…and, if not, well at least you’ve helped change someone else’s life (and relatedly your own) for the better.

3.    Who would you like to get to know better? One of the tribal benefits is getting to know the other person(s) better. The people who supported me live thousands of miles away, but time zones aside I know I can count on them. In an increasingly remote world, we can always use a bit more support and opportunities to connect.

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RECOMMENDED LISTENS, READS

How to take your remote team building beyond Zoom happy hours

This software company founder hired a “people experience manager” to bring his remote teams together with flamenco classes and other shared cultural activities.

Where We Go Wrong with Collaboration

Our beliefs about how we feel we need to “show up” for others can lead to extreme collaborative overload and burnout.  This article introduces nine common beliefs to reflect on; guarding against them will help you reclaim your time and redirect your efforts to where your contributions can add the most value.

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The Lighter Side of Self Awareness

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Are there any other subjects you want me to cover? Hit “Reply” and tell me!

I love hearing from you :)!

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If you enjoyed this newsletter, please forward to a friend (or 5 :) or someone you feel would benefit from reading it!

Andrea J. Miller

+1 (646) 556-5401 (Whatsapp)

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Creating Success by Supporting Each Other…

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